Monday, April 8, 2013

So, not really how I intended this to go...

So coming away from Rwanda, I needed to process a lot. Ok, let's say still processing a lot. There will be times when Justin and I are talking and it makes me remember something I heard or saw, and that provokes a story or a memory.  I hope those never go away.  I hope that years down the road parts of this trip that I tucked away pop back into my mind and cause me to think...cause me to act.

Today I want to attempt to share with you what I saw and felt the day we visited the orphanages, because lots of people have been asking, and I think maybe it's because we're adopting and our children our living in an orphanage, maybe it's because the images we usually have of orphanages are somewhat similar to that movie Annie.  I don't know how well I'll do with that because much of that is still in process.

When we arrived at the orphanage I saw the very familiar "blue gates" the gates I've seen in so many "Gotcha Day" videos, the gates mentioned in the book I bought for our boys, the gates I've heard about over the last few years.

I remember feeling very anxious, how would I respond, praying that God would use this to open my eyes even more.  I had been "prepared" in a sense.  I've read countless books on adoption, attachment, the results of institutionalism, etc.

Wathcing those things played out before my very eyes...heartbreaking. 

It made me desperately long to go get our little man more than ever. 

I used to wonder why God choose me to be born where I was...
Now I know. 
It's so that I can share what I've seen.

"Once our eyes are opened, we can't pretend we don't know what to do. God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows what we know, and holds us responsible to act." 
-Proverbs 24:12

Photo Cred: Rachel Wurzbach

“We learned that orphans are easier to ignore before you know their names. They are easier to ignore before you see their faces. It is easier to pretend they’re not real before you hold them in your arms. But once you do, everything changes.”
 – David Platt

Change is coming. 

1 comment:

Dianne said...

That's the exact way I felt when I visited the over-crowded orphanages in the Philippines. Would love to grab some coffee with you and chat about your trip. Let me know when you are free!